Seriously, it’s been a weird week. When I stepped back from the blog, I found out something interesting. A few things, actually. I’ll share them momentarily.

I’ll also share this chocolate chip streusel banana bread, which is heaven. How can it not be? It’s the most perfect banana bread, all filled and topped with chocolate chips and the most delightful, crumbly streusel.

Back when JAB began, I had just come away from a traumatic life event. I’ve talked about it before, and so I’ll just quickly summarize. My youngest daughter had a dangerous birth with an abrupted placenta, and both she and I went into distress. I remember looking at the ceiling as everything went blurry, struggling to breathe, watching Kenny tending to the baby and thinking, “I’m going to die alone.” It was not a moment I’d like to repeat, though someday I will, of course.

Afterward, I blamed myself. She’d been breech, and I’d been doing a lot of alternative methods to try and turn her, like acupuncture and chiropractic maneuvers. All of these were doctor-approved, and when I asked the doctor afterward if it could have caused the trauma, he insisted that it was just bad luck and nothing more. But somebody  close to the family suggested to me that it had been my fault, and no matter how vehemently I denied it to her, I was angry and forlorn.

Thus began a year of not being that nice to myself. I was probably suffering some form of postpartum depression as well, and I set about holding myself accountable for both things that were in and out of my control. I sought perfection, and it wasn’t sustainable. I began to heal.

JAB was part of my healing process. I gave myself permission to be fun for a while and to try new things. I took up the guitar, started this blog, and began trying things I’d never tried before. I wanted to see what I could do, however imperfectly. It was humbling. I stink at the guitar, but I love it. The blog has been just fine, but not anything super special. And I’m not perfect, but boy, I’d like to think that I’m special.

Along the road, I met lots of blog friends who supported me. Alice and Dorothy, who continued to help me whenever I needed it despite the fact that they are big news and I am not. So many big-time bloggers never give anyone the time of day, but they did. I will always consider them friends. Cheyanne and Annie and Kate, who felt like friends in the struggle, and who are all magnificent. Gayle, who has achieved so much so quickly. Lisa, whose sense of humor I relate to like crazy. And endless more people I spent parts of my virtual week with. I’ll still visit their blogs, but I’ll miss the interaction.

What I discovered on my week off is that I am still as busy as I was before, but I have the space now to give everybody and everything a little more time. My children now have more of my undivided attention on weekends, and that’s priceless. Plus, for the first time in years, I picked up a spiritual text and started reading it. I’ve been avoiding religious texts since the incident years ago, not sure of how to tackle some of my biggest spiritual questions. Now I want to face my fears and get on with living.

As I said last week, I’m taking a break. I don’t know how permanent this is, or if I’ll miss JAB so much that I’ll be back within a few weeks. No idea. But I have to give myself this time, and we’ll go from there. Hope your autumn goes beautifully, and I’ll miss you for now!

When that happens, I head to bakeries or farmers’ markets. At both, there are people displaying their wares and their creativity. I need both, believe me!

At the market a few weeks ago, a woman was selling turtle scones. The second I saw them, I knew I had to bake my own. Here they are. Could anyone not want these for breakfast? Nope, didn’t think so!

I’ve had a soft spot for Turtles (the candy, not the animal) since I was a kid. My dad would bring my mom a box every Valentine’s Day, and she would always share with me. How great is that? A mom sharing her special candy with her kids is true love. I’ve loved Turtles ever since.

The animal I’m less certain about. Turtles live for a looooong time. Sea turtles live to be at least 100, and those little ones you buy in the pet store live to about 30. I’m not sure I could ever make that long a commitment. Imagine how attached I’d get to my turtle, and how I’d feel when he passed. If he passed before me, that is. They can really hold on.

Still, turtles are cute. I remember this one from my zoology class in high school that somehow got into a duct and crawled all  the way through and into our vice principal’s office. Oh, the screams. That was such a good day.

These turtle scones will only cause screams of joy, I guarantee you. I promise!

The base of these scones is cream, which makes them light and crumbly in the best way. Chopped caramels, pecans (or walnuts) and chocolate chips get right in there for a true breakfast pastry party. No better way to start your day that I’ve ever seen!

No matter what kind of turtle makes your day, these scones are definitely the way to go on this particular day. Hope you have a great Wednesday!

Well, I do. I know, I know. No-bake treats are all the rage this time of year, but heck, I like to bake. A baker’s gonna bake. That’s how it goes. That’s why somebody smart invented air conditioning.

Every weekend, I find myself staring at tired bananas. They call to me, and sometimes I ignore them. That’s usually when I’m just as tired as they are. But sometimes I cut them up and freeze them for smoothies that I never really make, and that’s an effort right there. But if I’m feeling really energetic and serious, I’ll bake them into something. And this double chocolate chunk banana bread is probably one of the best ways ever to use those bananas!

Speaking of bananas, I’m going bananas. Really. My activity level has ratcheted up to a crazy degree. I’m at work all the time except on weekends, when I’m thinking about being at work. It’s great being energized, full of ideas, and fired on all cylinders. On the other hand, the people I love are starting to get concerned. My mom offered Kenny and me an overnight trip away from it all so that I don’t burn out early in this new job. Isn’t she the best mom ever?

The truth is, I have gotten used to being able to do lots of things at the same time, but I don’t know how long I can keep that up. I’ve given up cake decorating class and guitar lessons for now, both of which hurt to let go. Those are fun activities, but they’re also time commitments I just don’t have right now. I told my guitar teacher that I’ll pick it back up when I get my footing at work.

The blog is, quite frankly, another concern. Since I took up JAB, I’ve been posting consistently 3-4 times a week. There’s no way that can continue, and Kenny has suggested I knock it down to twice a week. I’m thinking about it, people. I’ll keep you posted. This blog is not just a nice little side business; it’s also a source of passion. It’s just hard sometimes keeping all the balls in the air, especially with my crew at home to take care of.

On that ominous note, let’s focus on the good stuff. Namely, this double chocolate chunk banana bread!

It’s actually pretty healthy, and it’s gluten-free as well. The bread is made with Greek yogurt for added softness and moisture, and cocoa gives it the lovely chocolatey dark color. I filled the bread with dark chocolate chunks, and that’s pretty much all, folks!

Right now, life is stretching me in 50 different directions and I’m adjusting. Stay with me during this time and keep reminding me that it’s okay to be human and occasionally post twice a week. Maybe I’ll start listening!

Lately, I’ve been trying to bake with conventional flour a little bit less. After all, I’ve got a GF spouse, so it’s the least I can do. The good news is, this bread is still amazing, gluten or no. And it’s filled with strawberries and chocolate chips (and covered in chocolate)!

Can we say thank you? Someone. Please. I’m hungry for praise and dessert.

This is the week my students take the AP test I’ve been preparing them all year for, and I’m feeling pretty good. They’re ready to excel, and I’m ready to sit back and take a deep breath. Another year slowly ends, and another crop of students can now write better than they could nine months ago. I’ll take it.

It’s pretty sad that teenagers have such a bad reputation in our society, because they’re great. They work so hard, and they still believe in making a difference for the better in our world. People complain about them being tuned out with headphones and smartphones, but have you looked around? That’s the adults. They’re just as bad. And they’re old enough to know better.

Even though it’s hard to change your perceptions, try and give adolescents a break. There’s nothing wrong with their generation that wasn’t wrong with yours, too. And they’re dealing with the technology piece as well, which makes their lives a lot more complicated than we can possibly understand. They need support, not condemnation.

Okay, my PSA is over. Let’s get back to dessert. Which, incidentally, teens tend to love as much or more than adults. Their sugar tolerance is higher. Or maybe it’s just their metabolic rate.

This bread is all about moisture. I put in a hefty dose of brown sugar to make that happen, as well as some buttermilk. If you don’t keep buttermilk handy, just take a tablespoon of vinegar or lemon juice (not both!) and put it in a cup, filling the rest with milk up to the one-cup mark. That will work too!

Once the chocolate chips are worked in and a thick chocolate glaze is poured on top, this bread is the ultimate indulgence. And there’s no butter in it or flour. So it’s even kind of healthy!

Take this week to appreciate our younger generation, who will be our bosses soon enough. And enjoy a slice (or five) of this chocolate-covered strawberry bread while you’re at it!

The gas light comes on in the car. Your six-month dental checkup comes due. You realize you didn’t pay your credit card bill. Somebody gets the promotion you deserved. Your favorite pair of shoes loses a heel in the middle of the workday. And the bananas lie forgotten on the counter, turning from green to yellow to spotty to brown.

But that last one has a definite upside because all you do is bake it into banana bread. Moist, delicious, banana bread filled and glazed with brown sugar. Just for those days when things aren’t going quite your way!

The other day, we took the kids to a swim center with a three-foot therapy pool. If you’ve never been to one of those, I must recommend it. The water is warm (like in the 80s warm), and the pool is surrounded by hot tubs.

Sadly, I never actually bonded with the hot tubs because I was with my four year-old (who cannot swim), but it felt good to sit with her in the warm water, waves gently lapping to and fro. The pool also had a slide and splash fountains, which means my older kids had a blast.

See, here’s the thing. We’ve been desperately trying to get our children, especially our oldest, to swim. He’s fighting it like nothing else. We’ve been through six rounds of lessons and it’s still not technically happening. At least he’s not doing what he did last summer, which was holding onto the side with a death grip while floating his legs out, screaming, “I’m swimming! I’m swimming!”

Now we’ve got some head under water progress, and I’m waiting for the day when they can all float so I can breathe a little easier. I see families at the pool relaxing and I think, hey, that could be me someday. But somehow I doubt it. No matter how soon or how well my kids swim, I’ll always be that mom squatting at the edge of the pool, eyes darting back and forth at all her spawn. Yes, even when they’re 25. I can only relax at a pool when my kids aren’t there.

So after we all trooped back from the swim center, we had this banana bread waiting for us. It was a good after-pool snack because you know everyone is always starving after a swim. This bread is hearty and doesn’t disappoint.

To make sure everyone could enjoy it, I used gluten-free oat flour as the base. And instead of using just white sugar, I put a great deal of brown sugar into the batter to make it super moist. The top is covered with a buttery, thick brown sugar glaze. It tastes like caramel.

Life is full of inconveniences, but nobody ever complained about the leftover bananas on the counter. Or at least, they shouldn’t. Because they make the sweetest brown sugar banana bread ever. Whether you bake this up for Mother’s Day or just for a random day of the week, it’s a fantastic breakfast treat!

Like, I’ve heard that winning the lottery is pretty awesome. But if that happens to you, you’re not supposed to tell anyone or they’ll be trying to bum your winnings. I guess you’re supposed to pretend that the new mansion (complete with pool, personal trainer and stylist) came from a modest amount that a rich uncle left you upon his passing.

Fresh bread is nothing to keep secret. Oh, no. You have to share it liberally, announcing to one and all that you have a fresh loaf to be eaten. Especially a loaf like this one. It’s got a delicious almond chocolate filling, so it bridges the gap between actual food and dessert. I had it for breakfast!

My son’s birthday was this past weekend, following hard on the heels of Purim, a celebratory Jewish holiday. I’ll show you my Cruella DeVil outfit in a bit. Suffice it to say, we had a busy four days of straight partying. My kids are so sugared up that they can’t see straight.

Celebrations are nice, but for the people who throw them, they’re nothing short of one thing after another. Like, I forgot the birthday candles. Yep, totally spaced them. Luckily, the boy’s cake was blinged out enough without one.

And my Cruella costume was lacking actual fur. For one thing, I couldn’t bring myself to wear one. For another, it was 75 degrees out.

Okay, back to bread. Say hello to your bread machine, because it does all the work for you! Have I mentioned how in love with my bread machine I am? Have I? Have I?

Yeah, yeah, I know. But this miraculous contraption literally lets me set it and forget it, which not a whole lot of life allows anybody to do. Imagine if we could just set and forget everything, from dinner to housework to actual work. Then we wouldn’t need to win the lottery in order to have personal assistants and whatnot.

This bread is made doubly simple by the filling. It’s simply the almond pastry spread they sell in the bakery aisle combined with mini chocolate chips. See? No effort, folks! I’m down with that!

And who can resist the sprinkling of almonds on top? Not me!

It’s been a crazy week, folks, and now I’m heading for some much-needed downtime over spring break. Join me in relaxing over a slice or two of bread!

See, everyone’s about that lemon loaf cake you get at Starbucks, and I guess that it’s good. I’ve never actually eaten more than a bite of it, and it’s tasty, but I wish they’d make a lime version. I wouldn’t be able to stop at just a bite.

This cake is sweet and tangy at the same time, filled through and through with fresh lime juice and zest. It’s even in the glaze. Somebody (cough, cough) couldn’t stop licking the glaze bowl.

Years ago, I learned about Seasonal Affective Disorder (also known very appropriately as SAD) and it was very much a “duh” moment. I mean, no kidding. We’re sadder when it’s cold and gray outside? Isn’t that kind of a no-brainer?

I don’t think I realized how insidious SAD could be until Kenny told me last week that every winter, he can see the change in my personality. I must not be that self-aware, because I had no idea. I guess I do get gloomy, but I didn’t realize other people could tell.

It’s like when I was pregnant. When I was in that condition, I was incredibly blunt. I’d blurt out the first thing that came into my head, and I think the only thing that saved me was that I happened to be pregnant. Otherwise, people would have  gotten justifiably more irritated by it. But then one time, a student jokingly referred to me as an “angry pregnant woman,” and I was totally shocked. That wasn’t how I saw myself at all. But maybe I was being more angsty at the time.

It’s hard to see yourself accurately, and when other people offer you a glimpse, it’s not easy to decide whether to believe them or not. My students (teenagers might be too candid at times) have also told me that I am very intimidating. It’s weird for me to hear that, because in my head, I’m a harmless, literature-loving dessert addict. Intimidating? Really?

I guess we never truly know ourselves, but maybe other people don’t, either. We all project versions of ourselves outward consciously, but it’s impossible to control how others will interpret us. The sooner we realize that perceptions don’t equal truth, and that we need to consider multiple points of view, the better off we’ll probably be.

And hey, Starbucks needs to consider offering a lime loaf. Nothing will cure SAD faster than a solid zip of lime to the senses. I’ve mentioned it before, but lime is summer in a little zesty citrus fruit.

This cake is pretty delightful. It’s got butter, yes, which helps. And it’s also got the perfect balance of lime to even out the sweetness. All you need is one lime and a microplane zester. Those are the best kitchen gadgets ever.

If you’re having a rough winter, or if someone isn’t seeing you the way you perceive yourself, there’s always loaf cake. It’s a lot easier to get perspective after a sunny snack.

I’ve taken out the raisins and seeds and put in chocolate chips and cocoa. As a result, I’m a very happy girl right now.

The bread itself isn’t sweet (except for the chocolate chips here and there), but there’s a lovely chocolate flavor throughout that makes this quite a wonderful St. Patrick’s Day snack!

Now that the Oscars are over, can I get in on the controversy? Hey, better late than never.

Back in the day, I got really excited about the Oscars. Hey, I was a kid. I didn’t overthink the situation. All I knew was that the fashion was fun and that for a few hours, I could watch celebrities hobnobbing and performing. It was just a fun TV night.

As you know by now, this year things got really heated. There’s no doubt that equal representation in Hollywood (in the movies themselves or at the awards shows) has not yet been achieved, and I am duly upset about it. But there’s something else about all awards shows that bothers me.

Why do we give actors so much screen time for recognition? I mean, we’re talking endless hours of airtime, media coverage, and money that gets poured into awarding people who have made it in the television and film industry. They’re all talented, so I’m not trying to hate on their craft. But why are they the heroes? Why do they get all those moments in the sun?

People risk their lives every day (or actually give up their lives) to save humanity, and I don’t see them being recognized or rewarded. Heck, they’re not even paid that well. Instead, people who pretend to be heroes, who play the part, get all the credit. It’s so much more glamorous to play a firefighter who dies to save others than to actually be one.

The real heroes have been taught not to expect appreciation as a matter of course, and that’s the way it is. But the way we celebrate Hollywood is positively obscene. Do you know about the gift bags that Oscar nominees receive? Some publications have estimated the worth of these gift bags to be around $200,000 each. Really? Is that necessary?

And that doesn’t include the expense of the show itself, or the parties, or the fashion, or the salary bumps that the world’s most successful and well-paid actors receive once they win that gold statuette. I’m not all about the money (I did go into teaching, after all), but that’s just insult to injury when you consider how much time and attention is spent on rewarding people in show business.

Okay, rant concluded. Deep breath. Soda bread.

Every year on St. Patrick’s, someone brings a soda bread into the office. It’s the standard issue soda bread, which has a lovely flavor and texture and goes perfectly with butter. I enjoy it, to a point. But man…those caraway seeds. Not my thing.

What I’ve done here is probably super not okay with traditional St. Patrick’s Day revelers, so I apologize. But I had to. The bread gets a shot of cocoa and some chocolate chips. And it’s not hard to put together at all. The video is the proof!

This bread is simple to make and accessible. Nothing fancy going on here! Nope, we save that for the Oscars. They can have the overdone display of exclusion and artificial emotion. I’ll keep it real with the baking!

Lately, I’ve been all about the recipes you throw into a bowl and mix together. No mixer, no butter to cream. Not only is that absence of butter healthier, but the actual baking process is just a teeny bit simpler. So why not?

This particular bread is filling and hearty, but full of chocolate chips just to brighten your Friday morning breakfast. Anyone wanna argue with that? I didn’t think so.

If you’ve heard me talk about my job before (my other one, not the blogging gig) as a high school English teacher, you know I love it. There’s not much that is more energizing than spending the day teaching and learning, and if not for the whole having to grade papers thing, it would be the perfect job.

I’m heading into my 17th year as a teacher next year, and it’s given me a lot to reflect about. When I first began teaching, there was so much fear. I thought I wouldn’t be able to reach kids, or help them, or manage a classroom. And while I worked through those fears as the years went on, this job allows nobody to become complacent. The second I decide I have it all figured out is when I get knocked for a loop.

Humility is a huge part of staying successful in teaching, and probably in other fields as well. Every now and then we read about actors or athletes whose stars burn brightly and then explode (in a bad way). Among these stories is a common thread: they weren’t humble enough. They thought they were irreplaceable.

Sadly, we’re all expendable professionally. I might be a good teacher, but there are a bazillion more lined up and waiting to do my job, so I have to give it my all. And in order to do that, I need a good breakfast every morning before I face my amazing students.

This oatmeal chocolate chip bread is incredibly simple. As I mentioned, all you do is mix everything up. No special equipment is necessary. And when you’re done, the result is a not-too-sweet breakfast treat. Actually, I also ate it after work.

However you spend your professional time, it’s important to realize how lucky we are to be given opportunities. Having self-confidence is important, but translating that to an over-inflated sense of ego is where it can all go wrong.  Be good enough, and strive to be great. But never forget that it takes constant effort and humility to keep your star in the sky.

Well, my world, anyway. There are certain days (or weeks) when facing the day is just hard. Maybe I have to work a 12-hour day before heading home to my kids, or maybe a student of mine has been going through something rough and I’m absorbing the pain. It’s not always cake!

On days like that, I need an easy breakfast to throw together. This muffin base is simple, butter-free (and therefore a health food, of course), and easily customized. I chose lime zest (a.k.a. summer in a whiff) and white chocolate chips, but you can use any old mix-ins. It’s all about making your mornings as happy as possible!

I know it’s pretty common for people to whine about winter, so I try not to do it a lot. But being honest here, this time of year is an endless struggle for me. You see, I have an autoimmune disorder that restricts the blood vessels all over my body. In warm weather, my blood flows freely and I feel energetic, vibrant and positive.

But when winter hits, I range from a partial lack of feeling in my arms and legs (and even other parts of me on bad days) to a continuous ache in those areas. It’s totally manageable, but there is a tangible difference between the person I am in warm weather and the person I am right now. I’m just waiting for the seasons to shift so that things can get better.

And I don’t even mean to complain (though it reads that way, I know), because I’m really lucky. At least my problem is seasonable and it’s workable. A lot of people suffer with chronic pain and exhaustion and there’s not anything they can do to make it better.

While I like to think of the Sylvia Plath quotation that there’s not a whole lot that a good book and a good bath doesn’t fix, we all know what happened to her. So I think it’s really important to focus on self-pampering when possible. That could be wrapping yourself up in a cozy heated blanket at work with a mug of tea, or taking a bubble bath at night, or taking a 20-minute power nap, or having muffins for breakfast. Or why not do it all?

Well, time often gets in the way, but that’s why I love these muffins. They take no time at all to make (the video will show you!) since it’s a simple matter of mixing dry ingredients with wet ones, and then you’re done. Check it out!

This time of year, I start baking with citrus more, especially lime. Lime to me is summer. When I zest a lime and the aroma reaches my nose, I feel sunny days and sand and margaritas. These muffins reached me at the heart of my winter blah feelings and really helped alleviate some of the grayness everywhere.

And white chocolate with lime is the best. If you haven’t gone for that tangy-sweet combo, try it now!

It’s totally okay to hate on a season for whatever reason, but just be sure to self-pamper. After all, there’s no guarantee than anyone else will do it for you. Make some muffins, grab some tea and have a moment!