Whenever I’m feeling kind of meh, I have a few options. A nap isn’t usually possible (there are small children about), so I can either try to sneak episodes of whatever TLC show is new on Netflix without the li’l ones noticing, or I can make a pie. It’s hard to hide what my iPad is doing, so I think the pie wins this one.
Once again, I made an awesome pie that has no convenient title. Maybe pie isn’t meant to be put into a little box with words.
So instead, I’ll summarize. Ready? Oreo crust. Mocha mousse filling. Chopped Heath bar garnish.
Can we get some applause here? Maybe a reward of some kind? Actually, eating the pie is its own reward.
This might be one of those days when I’m mainlining pie. See, I just read another Donald Trump quote. Before we get into it, let me just be clear: I’m not talking politics right now. I’m just talking about this one person and his views on women.
We all know that the word “feminist” is loaded, and that’s too bad. It has taken me many years to be confident enough to say, loud and clear, that I am a feminist. If we need to define that, my view is that men and women should be equal. That means that we should be given the same opportunities, be on the same pay scale, and be free from societal double standards. As in, I don’t think that it’s fair to call a man a “player” and a woman a “slut” (pardon my language) when they’re engaging in the exact same behavior.
Enter Donald Trump. He’s on record as referring to women as “bimbos,” “fat pigs,” and “dogs.” He’s been very clear that he subscribes to the ancient idea that women are less intelligent than men. Anyone who truly believes that should probably not be in charge of anything more serious than real estate.
If anyone had made similar comments about men, I’d be up in arms, too. I think all of us deserve fair treatment. Let’s not even get started on Trump’s comments about people who come to America from other countries. He’s sounding scarily racist, and people need to speak out and defend others. It’s not okay to victimize people on the basis of their race or gender. It’s 2015. Get with the program.
And it’s also not too professional for a presidential candidate to be using derogatory or foul language. But I’m picky about language, being an English teacher and all. I know that I never use certain words in the workplace. Maybe he shouldn’t, either.
I have a theory about politics, actually. Here it is: if we all stopped arguing and started eating pie, the world would be a much happier place. Or, you know, dysfunctional. But there would be pie.
This pie is partially no-bake, which is always a lot of fun. The crust is made of Oreos, and then I whip up heavy cream and combine it with melted chocolate and coffee to make a mocha mousse. It’s coffee chocolate heaven. And if you’ve never had Heath bars with coffee (any Coffee Coffee Buzz Buzz Buzz Ben and Jerry’s eaters out there?), it’s the best flavor pairing ever.
Just be careful, because once you start eating this pie, you probably won’t stop. But that’s okay. It’s much healthier to eat this whole thing under a blanket in the closet than to listen to Donald Trump talk about women. Like he knows anything about us.
- Preheat the oven to 350. Coat a 9-inch pie plate with cooking spray. Set aside.
- In a bowl, mixed the crushed Oreos and melted butter until the crumbs are moistened. Press the mixture into the pie plate, packing the crumbs into the bottom and up the sides.
- Bake for 15 minutes until set. Cool completely.
- Make the mousse. In a microwave-safe bowl, combine the instant coffee with the cold water and mix well. Add the chocolate chips. Heat at 30-second intervals, stirring each time, until everything is melted and smooth. Set aside.
- In the bowl of a stand mixer, whip the heavy cream until stiff peaks form. Do not overdo it!
- Gently fold the chocolate mixture into the heavy cream until a uniform color (no streaks!) appears.
- Spoon the mousse into the cooled pie crust, smoothing out the top evenly. Sprinkle the chopped Heath bars on top.
- Chill the pie for at least three hours, preferably overnight. Cut into wedges. Store in the refrigerator.