Seriously, it’s been a weird week. When I stepped back from the blog, I found out something interesting. A few things, actually. I’ll share them momentarily.

I’ll also share this chocolate chip streusel banana bread, which is heaven. How can it not be? It’s the most perfect banana bread, all filled and topped with chocolate chips and the most delightful, crumbly streusel.

Back when JAB began, I had just come away from a traumatic life event. I’ve talked about it before, and so I’ll just quickly summarize. My youngest daughter had a dangerous birth with an abrupted placenta, and both she and I went into distress. I remember looking at the ceiling as everything went blurry, struggling to breathe, watching Kenny tending to the baby and thinking, “I’m going to die alone.” It was not a moment I’d like to repeat, though someday I will, of course.

Afterward, I blamed myself. She’d been breech, and I’d been doing a lot of alternative methods to try and turn her, like acupuncture and chiropractic maneuvers. All of these were doctor-approved, and when I asked the doctor afterward if it could have caused the trauma, he insisted that it was just bad luck and nothing more. But somebody  close to the family suggested to me that it had been my fault, and no matter how vehemently I denied it to her, I was angry and forlorn.

Thus began a year of not being that nice to myself. I was probably suffering some form of postpartum depression as well, and I set about holding myself accountable for both things that were in and out of my control. I sought perfection, and it wasn’t sustainable. I began to heal.

JAB was part of my healing process. I gave myself permission to be fun for a while and to try new things. I took up the guitar, started this blog, and began trying things I’d never tried before. I wanted to see what I could do, however imperfectly. It was humbling. I stink at the guitar, but I love it. The blog has been just fine, but not anything super special. And I’m not perfect, but boy, I’d like to think that I’m special.

Along the road, I met lots of blog friends who supported me. Alice and Dorothy, who continued to help me whenever I needed it despite the fact that they are big news and I am not. So many big-time bloggers never give anyone the time of day, but they did. I will always consider them friends. Cheyanne and Annie and Kate, who felt like friends in the struggle, and who are all magnificent. Gayle, who has achieved so much so quickly. Lisa, whose sense of humor I relate to like crazy. And endless more people I spent parts of my virtual week with. I’ll still visit their blogs, but I’ll miss the interaction.

What I discovered on my week off is that I am still as busy as I was before, but I have the space now to give everybody and everything a little more time. My children now have more of my undivided attention on weekends, and that’s priceless. Plus, for the first time in years, I picked up a spiritual text and started reading it. I’ve been avoiding religious texts since the incident years ago, not sure of how to tackle some of my biggest spiritual questions. Now I want to face my fears and get on with living.

As I said last week, I’m taking a break. I don’t know how permanent this is, or if I’ll miss JAB so much that I’ll be back within a few weeks. No idea. But I have to give myself this time, and we’ll go from there. Hope your autumn goes beautifully, and I’ll miss you for now!

The thing is, pound cake can be a little too crazy decadent. The pound cakes of yore would actually sweat butter, if you know what I’m saying. But how else to get a lovely pound-ish cake without the butter?

Brown sugar to the rescue! Thanks to the higher moisture content of my favorite sugar choice, this cake can be made with healthy canola oil and still be the perfect cake to dip in fondue or leave plain. Sounds like a winner to me!

We need some winning right now. Twice a year, ants come into my house and get way too comfy. All the ant spray in the world can’t ultimately stop the little buggers.

One thing that weirds me out about ants is that they crawl in and out through electrical sockets. On an intellectual level, I realize they can’t get electrocuted that way. Still, it makes me mad that they can do it. And that I can’t chase them in there and kill them.

Don’t get me wrong: I’m not hugely bloodthirsty or anything. But when I see ants all over the place, I get this bizarre urge to take them all out. It’s my house, dangit. Get out!

Thanks to the ants, I also had to clean out my baking cabinet and throw away anything that might tempt them that was open. Bye bye, chocolate chips. Bye bye, sugary sprinkles. Oh, the pain.

Luckily, I have cake to distract me. Isn’t that always the case?

This is a one-bowl recipe with no crazy creaming or pyrotechnics. Just plain old mix and serve! Plus, this recipe will yield two regular loaves or one gigantic one. That’s pretty neat!

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got some ants to go deal with. Let’s hope the freeze comes soon!

Like, getting a box of chocolates or flowers without an occasion? That sounds like it would be nice. Note to Kenny: do that more. Hear me, love of my life?

Another pleasant surprise? Finding a layer of pumpkin cheesecake in the middle of a delicious loaf of pumpkin chocolate chip bread. It’s double the fun!

Now that TV has started up again, I’m overwhelmed by the obligation I have to continue watching many shows. Yes, it’s a chore. A fun one, but a chore nonetheless.

Last season, we watched Superstore. It’s a silly piece of sitcom fluff, and I like silly in my life. Being serious is so overrated. But now I have to find time to add that to the list. See, I’m still trying to finish Casual on Hulu, Suits on Amazon Prime, and then I have to pick up Once Upon a Time again, even though the storyline has gotten totally weird.

The problem is, Kenny and I watch these together, so both of us have to be available (and awake) to make it through. It’s not that logistically easy. He plays ball sometimes, and I have the habit of passing out at 8:30 every night. It’s not auspicious for good TV watching.

Also, Kenny has a very short attention span with TV shows. He forgets them or loses interest quickly, and then we tend to not finish things. like seasons 6 and 7 of Mad Men, which has fallen by the wayside, or seasons 3 and 4 of Orange is the New Black. Gone.

But hey, I shouldn’t complain. We have so many good options. Do you remember when you were at the mercy of the TV schedule? Those grueling days are gone!

You know what else is gone? Plain old pumpkin bread. Not that I’m hating, because I’m not. But this is sooooo much better.

In the middle of these moist and gluten-free layers is pumpkin cheesecake. It’s lovely. The creamy pumpkin middle layer does full justice to the cakey outer layer. Woohoo!

Hope you have a lovely fall TV season, and that you get caught up on all your shows. It’s hard work! Better have some pumpkin chocolate chip cheesecake bread around to make it easier!

I do that a lot in the fall. My baking this time of year contains a lot of cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger, and cloves. If I take something out of the oven right before I head up to bed, I can actually drift off for the night with all those autumn spices whirling around my senses. I highly recommend you try it.

Even though it’s soaring back up to the 90s this week here in the sunny DC area, I’ve been baking for crunchy leaves and cooler breezes since Labor Day ended. This cake is no exception, and it’s magnificent. The base is pumpkin goodness, filled with all those lovely spices and chocolate chips. Did I mention that the whole cake is smothered in a rich chocolate glaze?

Last week was full of mishaps. As in, just a terrible week. On Wednesday I was at work when I learned that one of my teachers had fallen, so I rushed down the hall to check on her. On my way, I slipped in a stealth water spill and fell down too. Irony? The teacher was fine, but I couldn’t walk so well. I had to get to the urgent care clinic because my doctor wouldn’t see me without some kind of crazy workman’s comp claim number that I could’ve easily given him later (can I rant about healthcare sometime soon?) for an x-ray. Luckily, nothing was broken, but I’m very swollen and bruised.

To compound that (yes, I’m complaining), I had a 22-mile commute the next day to a training class. I don’t like commuting. More complaining.

That evening was Back to School Night, which means I had to be on my A-game to meet with parents. I put a pair of sneakers on over my bandaged foot (not my typical Back to School Night uniform of cute dress and heels) and went to work from my training class. When I opened my mouth, I realized that the fun continued. My voice was going.

See, I’ve had a cold for about a week, but it’s just been hovering. Do you ever have a hovering cold? It’s kind of polite in nature. It doesn’t intrude too much into your life except in the early morning or late at night, but then it really intrudes. No warning, and BAM! Suddenly, you’re going mute in front of parents.

By the next day, I had to face down my students with no voice at all. I spent the day croaking and rasping at them and feeling completely done in. Thank heaven the next day was Saturday. It was time to sit down and shut up. I was never gladder to do both.

One day into the weekend, and things are looking up. My foot is very bruised and still somewhat swollen, but it’s getting better. My voice is a light rasp now as opposed to completely silent, so yay. And I can bake even without a foot or a voice, so that’s the best news of all.

This cake is lovely. I don’t usually pair butter with pumpkin, but special occasions call for a fancier cake. What occasion, you might ask? Feeling better, y’all!

Because pumpkin and chocolate chip is the best combo ever, I had to put them into a decadent bundt with the best chocolate glaze in existence. This is my favorite glaze recipe bar none. It’s super easy, and it’s thicker than most glazes. It’s impossible not to love!

Last week was full of mishaps, but this week will be better and full of cake. It’s not how many times we fall, but how many times we determinedly get back up again. That’s what really matters!

If that sounds pretentious or immodest, please understand that I have a ton of baking fails as well, so whenever things go my way, I get super excited. This is one of those times.

This cake is autumn in a pan. When you bake it, your house will smell ah-may-zing. If we’re getting technical, this cake is the combined glory of cocoa, banana, pumpkin, and chocolate chips along with lovely fall spices like cinnamon and cloves. You’ve gotta bake it to believe it!

Before I get back to cake, I’m going to abruptly shift topic and talk about life 15 years ago.

As you all know, the 15th anniversary of 9/11 occurred two days ago. It occurred to me that I’ve never written down my own version of that day. You see, everyone has their own story about that day, just like people who were around the day that Kennedy got shot have stories. My story isn’t that interesting, but it’s mine. I wanted to write it down somewhere.

My original plan on September 11th, 2001 was to go to work and then move. As in, move into my first single-girl apartment ever in Washington, D.C. I’d never lived alone, and I had just started my job. Everything was new, exciting, and scary.

I remember being preoccupied by many mundane details. My futon was being delivered later that day, and I was hoping I’d make it back from my suburban high school to the new city pad in time to receive it. On the job end, I’d just started teaching high school seniors, and they were a tough crew. I was worried about it, and that’s kind of where I was mentally that day.

A lot of people remember a beautiful early September day. I don’t. I honestly was too much in my own head that day to notice anything. Well, until.

My problematic senior class had just ended when a student came back into the classroom and told me to turn on the TV. I had a typical teacher reaction; in other words, I said no. But he said, “You don’t understand. Please, this is important. Something is happening on the news.”

Something in his eyes made me reach for the remote and turn on the TV. The rest you know, because we experienced it together as a nation. Watching the first plane, then the second, followed by anger and confusion and worry. Hearing conflicting reports about which planes were touching down where. The Pentagon, the field in Pennsylvania. It all came together slowly and in a nightmarish, jumbled way.

Obviously, I didn’t move to D.C. that day. I moved on September 13th, where I looked around the undecorated walls of my tiny apartment and felt alone and afraid. New city, new job, new world. It was probably the most off-kilter I’d ever been at that point in my life, and the emotions alone had me in alt for quite a while.

That’s pretty much it. Not an exciting or distinctive story, but mine. I wanted to tell it sometime, and now I have.

Moving on to cake now seems absolutely uncalled for, but that’s the nature of life. It’s hard to know when to move from the serious to the frivolous, and it’s important to find balance in that spectrum.

This time of year, I find it comforting to bake with some of my favorite autumn spices: cinnamon, cloves, nutmeg. Another wonderful option is pumpkin pie spice. I don’t use that in this cake, but it’s also a great choice.

This healthier cake is butter-free. It also has hefty doses of both pumpkin and banana for extra moisture, so it’s a truly delightful experience. The chocolate chips don’t hurt, either!

Every September, I remember days gone by and look forward to the future. We all have memories and stories that make up who we are. Some of them are painful, while others are full of happy nostalgia. I hope that our more difficult times can help us appreciate all the good things in life that we’re lucky enough to experience.

When it comes to my birthday, I still feel like a little kid. I want presents, parties, and many celebrations. Sometimes that means I’m setting myself up. Let’s face it: I’m a mom of three and nobody has thrown me a party since I was 25. That was a loooooong time ago. But still, I hold out hope!

One thing I’ve learned to do is bake my own birthday treat. A few years ago, I baked this cookie cake for the first time. It was my favorite cookie cake ever, but my photo skills weren’t so great back then. Plus, I wanted to see if I could make the whole thing GF and a little easier. Done and done!

Now that I’m off the hook for jury duty (I didn’t get selected, but I did make it into a courtroom, so that’s always fun), I’m full steam ahead on getting ready for the school year ahead. That means a lot of organizing, cleaning, and decision-making.

When I changed schools earlier this summer, I left a very beautiful school building behind in exchange for one with a lot more history and age. My new work home is a lot older, but it’s kept up nicely and I’ve been feeling at home here.

The thing is, I’ve been getting this reaction from some people about my change of venue that is less than desired. People tend to set a lot of store by new and sparkly things. Hey, how can I blame them? New is usually very nice. But no matter how nice a space is, a school especially, the end result is what everyone makes of it.

Students make schools come alive, not awe-inspiring entryways or corporate-looking office spaces. This is a school, and it looks like one. Personally, I find that comforting.

Okay, end rant. Can I talk about this cookie cake now?

It’s chewy in the center and crispy at the edges, just like my favorite cookies are. There’s a layer of hot fudge that glues the peanut butter cups (both chopped up snack-sized and miniatures) to the top. And there are more chopped PB cups in the actual cookie.

Hey, it’s about to be my birthday. I want to do it up, and that means lots of peanut butter lover’s cookie cake for me. And if anyone wants to throw me a crazy wild party, just name the time and the venue. I’ll be there!

I’ve been on a banana kick this summer, and it’s probably just me making up for lost time. I barely posted any banana recipes in the first two years of the blog, so this summer it’s just bananas all the time. Plus, I don’t like to keep them on the counter in the summer. The bugs, they will come.

Plus, this feels like the right time to write about this cake. There’s a slice of it on my desk in my new office, and I’m looking out at the tree by my window and contemplating happy thoughts. Why not add a moist banana cake filled with both peanut butter cups and peanut butter chips to the mix? A gluten-free one, might I add?

I’ve never had a tree by a window where I work, and I’m finding it to be a very cheerful thing. There’s something about connecting to nature when you spend the day encased in cinder block that is very soothing.

The cinder block leads me to my big question here. You ready? Adhesive.

Yes, I said adhesive. I’ve been doing a lot of wall mounting as I set up this office, and things keep falling down. Seriously, one crash after another. I’ve been using adhesive mountings because I can’t make holes in the wall, but it’s not going well. You see, cinder block is very resistant to adhesive.

Any tips? And no, super glue is not one of them. I can’t do that. Or crazy glue. Or any glue at all. Can you help me before I lose my mind? If I hear one more thing come crashing to the floor, I might run for the hills.

A few months ago, I made this banana toffee snack cake, and people loooooved it. Seriously, I can never predict what people will go for. I make the most amazing thing and the pictures turn out great, and barely a reaction. But sometimes, a recipe just goes sailing through the interweb in the most gloriously unpredictable way.

This, then, is an experiment. I used the same cake base, but I changed up the mix-ins. To be honest, I love both versions. If they were my children, I’d love both equally. But as a peanut butter lover, I’d have to direct you toward this one. I mean, come on. It’s so happy.

Like my other banana recipes, this one is effortlessly gluten-free, thanks to oat flour. And it’s also super easy with no mixer or crazy bowl action needed. That means if I see a banana on the counter, it’s getting baked. This recipe is too simple not to go for it.

If you have any help to give me with adhesive matters, let me know. I need it. Pleeeeeeease!

Well, I do. I know, I know. No-bake treats are all the rage this time of year, but heck, I like to bake. A baker’s gonna bake. That’s how it goes. That’s why somebody smart invented air conditioning.

Every weekend, I find myself staring at tired bananas. They call to me, and sometimes I ignore them. That’s usually when I’m just as tired as they are. But sometimes I cut them up and freeze them for smoothies that I never really make, and that’s an effort right there. But if I’m feeling really energetic and serious, I’ll bake them into something. And this double chocolate chunk banana bread is probably one of the best ways ever to use those bananas!

Speaking of bananas, I’m going bananas. Really. My activity level has ratcheted up to a crazy degree. I’m at work all the time except on weekends, when I’m thinking about being at work. It’s great being energized, full of ideas, and fired on all cylinders. On the other hand, the people I love are starting to get concerned. My mom offered Kenny and me an overnight trip away from it all so that I don’t burn out early in this new job. Isn’t she the best mom ever?

The truth is, I have gotten used to being able to do lots of things at the same time, but I don’t know how long I can keep that up. I’ve given up cake decorating class and guitar lessons for now, both of which hurt to let go. Those are fun activities, but they’re also time commitments I just don’t have right now. I told my guitar teacher that I’ll pick it back up when I get my footing at work.

The blog is, quite frankly, another concern. Since I took up JAB, I’ve been posting consistently 3-4 times a week. There’s no way that can continue, and Kenny has suggested I knock it down to twice a week. I’m thinking about it, people. I’ll keep you posted. This blog is not just a nice little side business; it’s also a source of passion. It’s just hard sometimes keeping all the balls in the air, especially with my crew at home to take care of.

On that ominous note, let’s focus on the good stuff. Namely, this double chocolate chunk banana bread!

It’s actually pretty healthy, and it’s gluten-free as well. The bread is made with Greek yogurt for added softness and moisture, and cocoa gives it the lovely chocolatey dark color. I filled the bread with dark chocolate chunks, and that’s pretty much all, folks!

Right now, life is stretching me in 50 different directions and I’m adjusting. Stay with me during this time and keep reminding me that it’s okay to be human and occasionally post twice a week. Maybe I’ll start listening!

My family, of course. My kids are still at that age when they want me around all the time, so I’ve been peeling them off me as I head to the car to go to work. It’s a nice feeling, being wanted. I know they won’t always feel that way, so I’m enjoying that. And Kenny is my rock, the one who listens to me talk endlessly when I’m decompressing after a long day.

But let’s not forget you all! JAB is one of my constants as well, and I love the rhythm of baking for the blog. Nothing is quite so relaxing as mixing things together. This week, I decided that the tired bananas on my counter needed a little more than just the usual treatment, so I got sneaky and put a cheesecake filling into the center. Hello, beautiful!

I’m pretty proud of the fact that when bananas turn brown in my house, my son points them out and says, “Time to bake!” That’s right. He knows! I’m proud. Everyone also knows to ask if I’ve taken pictures of dessert yet before they dig in. Life in the home of a food blogger, people. It’s a party every day.

When you bake this much, you fall into the habit of having really good stuff around. Homemade stuff, the good stuff. So as a result, the packaged stuff becomes the treat. It’s a very bizarre reversal of the norm, where I’ll see a package of machine-made chocolate chip cookies and get really excited. I guess novelty has charm, huh? There’s something about that processed taste!

A lot of it is nostalgia, too. When I was growing up, my source of almost all dessert food was Entenmann’s or those really cheap grocery store brand cookies. To this day, no donut tastes better than an Entenmann’s rich chocolate frosted donut with a glass of milk. It’s like my childhood comes rushing back at me with each bite.

Food is a time machine, people. I think there’s no more reliable way to travel to childhood than to eat those foods you ate way back when. Nothing is quite as evocative or powerful. Maybe it’s because taste is such an integral part of our sensory spectrum, along with the sense of smell.

My love of banana in cake or quick bread also goes back to childhood. Now and then, my mom would take those brown bananas on the counter and make a banana bread. I never understood how a fruit that I felt pretty indifferent about (and now don’t eat as an adult unless it’s baked into something) could be the base of such a delicious dessert. That, in a nutshell, is the wonder of baking, and why I never cease to be fascinated at what a little bit of oven and lovin’ can do.

This snack cake is gluten-free, moist, and filled with a very simple cheesecake filling. It’s just cream cheese, sugar and egg. That’s it! The cake is also simplicity itself, all coming together in one bowl. Like childhood, it’s not that complicated. Oh, wait. Childhood is very complicated. I remember!

No matter how old we are, we can always go through adjustments. It’s important to have those constants in our lives that ground us and make us feel connected to something that represents a greater scheme. Along the path, it doesn’t hurt to have a lovely cake with a hidden layer of cheesecake to make life even more fun!

Every time I post a butterscotch recipe, I talk about how I don’t ever remember to bake with it. But when I do, it’s the best flavor explosion. I’m trying to do it more often, and the overripe bananas on my countertop always present a fantastic opportunity.

If you are one of those people who craves moist (sorry if you dislike that word, but whatever) banana bread with crunchy pecans and sweet butterscotch chips, look no further. This bread is your soul mate! And it’s effortlessly gluten-free, too.

I’ve spent the past few days packing up the high school that I’ve been privileged enough to teach at for most of my career. I’ll be the English department chair at my new school and I’m excited about the change, but it’s definitely tough to leave a school I’ve loved so much. I’ve had the best students, the best colleagues, and just the best time ever. Teaching can be a total blast.

When I started packing the other day, I quickly became horrified at just how much stuff I’ve acquired over the years. We’re talking 10 full boxes of stuff, plus three giant file bins, plus bags of odds and ends. When I texted Kenny pics of all my packed-up possessions, his response was “good grief” followed by “digitize.” I then had to launch into an explanation of how much teachers need to do instruction every day, all day, for years and years. We teach an awful lot of content, and that equals a lot of files. Plus, we make what are called “class sets,” which are sets of 30 copies for all our students, which we save from year to year. That way, no extra paper wasting. It all adds up!

Still, I have this image of bursting into my new school with all this stuff and scaring my new colleagues. So I might want to take it in there gradually under the cover of night or something. That way, I’ll seem halfway sane. And I’m not even going to explain this whole baking blogger thing I do for quite a while. People accuse me of doing too much, and they’re probably right, but busy is good!

Some people are afraid of change, but if it’s a change with potential for growth, I really embrace it. So know that these next several months will be insane for me, but I’ll be a happy camper! You all know that I keep myself in dessert to make life awesome.

This banana bread is just the best, bar none. It’s springy and soft and yes, moist. It’s got butterscotch chips in the batter and sprinkled on top, and chopped pecans inside as well. Butterscotch and pecan is one of those genius combos that I always love using.

I hope you have a very happy holiday weekend. I might get motivated to post something in there, but I think the blogosphere is officially on hold, so we shall see. In the meantime, enjoy the fireworks and parades, and have a super happy fourth!